refresh

"The Lord is my shepherd;

I shall not want.

He makes me to lie down in green pastures;

He leads me beside the still waters.

He restores my soul;

He leads me in the paths of righteousness

For His name's sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil;

For You are with me;

Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;

You anoint my head with oil;

My cup runs over.

Surely, goodness and mercy shall follow me

All the days of my life;

And I will dwell in the house of the Lord

Forever."

~ Psalm 23 ~

This poem never ceases to help me stop and rest.

Photo courtesy of Mountain Musing

Manifesto

I've never been a supporter of New Year's Resolutions. For no good reason, really; I'm just too much of a competitor against myself, that having a physical list of goals and desires for a year, that slip of paper seems to taunt me, setting me up for failure by default. 

Funny how a while back ago, I got this idea from The Art of Manliness. (Which may weird some people out considering I'm not a man. But that's okay; Weird and I are life-long chums.) I took it to heart, and my manifesto is something I do my best to live by. I fail, but I try. And honestly, life is not even about success. Life is about the trying. I will hold myself to a standard of grace, not perfection. I'm thinking of printing it out and tacking it above my dresser so I can see it every day because it's easy to forget. Anyways, this is who I desire to be and develop into as this new year unfolds.

Personal Manifesto:

I will put other above myself, knowing that greatness is found in service.

I will not refuse myself to be broken, whether it be under the conviction of my sin, or by the heaviness of pain and suffering found in the world. I will no longer keep my eyes closed.

I will not view myself as entitled to any good thing, but remember that each day is more than I deserve.

I will not speak ill of anyone out of senseless annoyance.

I will be kind rather than clever.

I will intentionally see the beauty all around me and I will praise its Creator.

I will use the talents God has given me to bless others and bring Him glory; I will not allow them to gather dust due to fear or apathy.

I will not make decisions designed to put myself in the spotlight.

I will surround myself with depth and wisdom in thought, through literature, museums, drama, music, films, and friends. I will not be trivialized by this culture.

I will not be deceived by the ideals of the world. I will not look for happiness in money, fame, men, opportunities to do what I love, or any of the desires of my heart of flesh. I will seek and do the will of God and remember that real happiness can only be found in the center thereof.

I will do all through the strength of Christ, knowing that I am too weak to win my battles alone, but that He has already won the war.

Photo courtesy: Of All Loveliness

2013 - With Me

These past several months I have been feeling weight. Struggle. Inadequacy. Fear. While nothing can deter my soul from it's calling, it is this same calling that produces a mental-emotional collision inside of me everyday. Put simply, I am constantly intimidated by what the Lord has placed in my heart. I've heard it said that when your destiny scares you, you're on the right track. For me, it only highlights my weaknesses, frailties, all the reasons why I can't and probably shouldn't be getting the muck of human suffering underneath my fingernails.

Coincidentally, I recently finished going through the books of Joshua and Judges for my personal devotions, two books that are filled to the brim of epic tales of the Israelites victoriously marching in the Promised Land, and of individuals who moved mightily to shake a nation's core into returning to God.

It's often easy to look at these people and be in awe of the strength they possessed, sizing them up for superhuman candidacy. In actuality, though, there's no such thing as "superhuman." So how did they accomplish such incredible acts? Take Jael, from Judges 4, for example. She killed an army's commander-in-chief by driving a tent peg through his skull. We already established that it was impossible for her to be superhuman; judging from the biblical account, I think it's safe to say that neither did she have rage issues or mental instability. She was just an ordinary wife, yet no "ordinary" woman is naturally inclined to do something so, pardon me, gross.

Herein lies the answer. Ever notice as you read through Joshua and Judges that phrases such as "The Lord was with them," "the Lord was on their side," or "the Spirit of the Lord came upon him" occur pretty frequently? That is the answer. How did Israel slay an entire nation of 2,000 people in one day? Because the Lord was with them. How did Samson slay a thousand men with just a donkey's jawbone? Because God's Spirit was upon him. 

Many Christians will subconsciously acknowledge the Lord's presence. "God is with you," we say when we hear a friend is going through a rough time. It's used as a Christian feel-good term. And yes, the Lord's presence is comforting, it is peaceful. But it is powerful. You literally have the presence of the One who spoke the cosmos into existence with you constantly, 24/7. Yet so often, we are content to let it lay on the shelf, not exposing ourselves to it, not giving ourselves to it, not dedicating our lives to the pursuit of it.

With this Presence, Moses lifted his rod and the children of Israel crossed through the Red Sea. With this Comfort, Peter saw the disciple Tabitha raised to life. With this Peace, Jesus walked on water and calmed a storm. And with this Power, we have the promise of working greater wonders than Jesus Himself accomplished during His time on earth.

It's not the question of His presence that I doubt. It's His power. Will He come through in my moment of need? I'm like Gideon, continually laying out the fleece, asking for a sign that He is indeed with me. 

"But Lord, I'm the youngest in my family."

I am with you.

"But You know my speech is not good, and I am not even close to public eloquence."

I am with you.

"And if they kill me?" (My mind refuses to think small when I'm terrified.)

I am with you.

And this is my anthem as I walk into this new year. Not knowing what it will hold, the challenges, the opportunities, new experiences.

He is with me. He is with me. He is with me.

"Have I not commanded you? 

Be strong and of good courage; 

do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, 

for the Lord your God is with you 

wherever you go."

~ Joshua 1:9 ~

Photo: Of All Loveliness