Lessons from a Tomato Vine

Earlier this spring, some wild notion possessed my dad to plant fourteen . . . yes, fourteen tomato plants in our backyard. I still haven't dug deep enough to understand his initial reasoning behind this course of action. At any rate, with summer in full heat, the tomatoes have been ripening left and right. We are very blessed.

When the harvesting first started, I would pull the red, but still hard, tomatoes off the vine and set them on our garden table for them to continue ripening. On the other hand, my mom would take scissors and cut a little piece of the vine along with the fat, juicy red sphere and set it on the table to allow it's ripening to complete.

Well, yesterday morning, Mom came in and exclaimed, "Rebeka, look at these!" I glanced up from reading the local newspaper to see her holding the vine-ripened tomatoes. "You know what this reminds me of?" she asked. Mentally I replied, I know what it reminds me of. Food. Yum. Without waiting for an answer, she explained.

"Remember in the Gospel of John when Jesus talks about how we are to abide in Him? Well, this is a perfect demonstration of that. These tomatoes have ripened better than the ones we picked directly off the plant. And it's the same with our relationship with God. When we abide in Jesus and surrender to His Lordship, He grows us to be a mature branch, enabling us, by His grace, to bring forth blossoming fruit for His glory."

With that, she left me, leaving me to wonder how she could have gotten such a deep spiritual truth from a gnarly tomato vine.

How true it is. I must abide in Christ in order to bear fruit to His Name. I cannot bear fruit on my own authority, thinking that somehow my words and actions will pique others' interest in the Gospel. Only by abiding in Jesus Christ can I have any assurance that my faith is indeed secure.

"Abide in Me, and I in you.

As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself,

unless it abides in the vine,

neither can you, unless you abide in Me.

I am the vine, you are the branches.

He who abides in Me, and I in him,

bears much fruit;

for without Me, you can do nothing.

If anyone does not abide in Me,

he is cast out as a branch and is withered;

and they gather them and throw them into the fire,

and they are burned.

If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you,

you will ask what you desire,

and it shall me done for you.

By this My Father is glorified,

that you bear much fruit;

so you will be My disciples."

~ John 15:4-8 ~

May I always seek the shelter and protection that comes from abiding in the Vine. And, possibly, may I bear much fruit to His Name.

Casual Elegance



Photo courtesy of Meant for Silence

When the phrase "casual elegance" is uttered, a handful of names come to mind - Audrey Hepburn, Selena Gomez, Kate Middleton, and Julie Andrews, among others. All of these women embody the combination of a carefree, relaxed attitude that allows them to appear just as pulled together and sophisticated in a pair of blue jeans as they do in a fresh-off-the-runway designer gown. They don't appear rushed or as if they are trying too hard. They seem very comfortable in their own skin - almost a take-it-or-leave-it attitude without going overboard and still exuding a nearly indescribable quality that makes you just want to enjoy their company. A relaxed refinement or grace, I guess you could say.

So the question I've been trying to figure out is how can I too carry off this casual elegant persona and welcome it into my life, creating a calmer, more relaxed environment that beckons a more playful, yet dignified and purposeful way of life? Here's what I've come up with so far.

Having Manners and an Engaging Sense of Humor

Being elegant requires that you have manners and exhibit proper etiquette, but becoming too refined eliminates the ability to be relaxed because there is so much stress on behaving correctly. By finding the balance of being able to behave respectfully, but being comfortable enough to have a chuckle, you help put others at ease. You set the example of what is expected, as well as what is tolerated because people do make mistakes.



Photo courtesy of Of All Loveliness. . .


Comfortable in a Dress as well as a Pair of Jeans
Now, I have never had the opportunity to wear a specially tailored designer down a red carpet like the talented Natalie Portman, but the idea here is to be able to be confident enough in your body to pull off a beautiful dress and turn around the next day and look smashing in a perfectly sized pair of jeans.

Able to Mix High and Low Fashions with Ease

Staying on the topic of fashion, someone who is casually elegant isn't about labels, but is instead aware of what looks best on their figure. Pairing ballet flats with Levi denim jeans and a navy cashmere sweater reveals to onlookers that you clearly have taste, but are not bragging about how much money you have - in fact, the sweater may be a consignment find you discovered last week while perusing the city, but no on will ever know. In other words, you have style because you know what works well together and what looks best on you.



Photo courtesy of Urban Weeds

 Neutral Decor with Cozy Elements

I like to think of casual elegance in the arena of home decor as the blending of English traditional and French country. By understanding that, a keep-it-simple approach is best for big ticket items - walls, sofas, floors, you name it. A homeowner can then have fun with accessories and create a home that is welcome to everyone, but home-sweet-home to its inhabitants.


Photo courtesy of Google Images

 Able to Converse with a Prince and a Pauper

Casual elegance can quickly be displayed in a person's behavior, but it also reveals itself in the words and conversations each person involves themselves in. Elegance is having a depth of knowledge to enable you to discuss concepts, ideas, and be informed of history and current events. Being casual allows you to recognize when to take it down a notch and make sure whoever you are talking with is comfortable.



Photo courtesy of Google Images

A Quiet Self-Confidence

A person possessing self-confidence isn't arrogant, but calm. Neither are they boisterous, but even-tempered. Having casual elegance in this case is not needing an audience, but attracting one because of a winsome, honest, and non-threatening quality that piques others' interest.

Ability to be Spontaneous without Losing Control

The term casual elegance is itself a balancing act of two somewhat opposing ideas, and so is this last point. Being elegant suggest that almost everything must be planned and adhered to, while casual reflects a more lackadaisical attitude. I believe that the two ideas, when melded together, create a healthy balance, that if anyone stuck to it they would find themselves taking chances that lead to great discovery and moments of unexpected delight. By being spontaneous for those moments that capture your attention and curiosity, but at the same time being able to notice the difference when the idea is just absurd, you are striking a balance that is the essence of being casually elegant.



Photo courtesy of Meant for Silence

The Irreplaceable Beauty of Trial

[Disclaimer: This post is something I like to call a get-it-out-of-your-system post. Therefore, it is more personally related than anything. Though, while it may be random, rambly, muddled, and unclear, I pray someone will be blessed by it.]

This summer marks the three-year anniversary of our family moving to Lancaster County, Pennsylvania.

See, my family and I had been living in Oklahoma for about eight and a half years. I grew up there. The majority of my childhood memories are located there. It was where I "fit." The regional atmosphere and culture seemed to tailored especially to me. It was my home.

A little over three years ago, the Lord directed my parents to move back to Lancaster (my life has been lived between Pennsylvania and Oklahoma). We had family living around there. Some of our life-long friends were there. My parents' roots were there. My father decided that our time in Oklahoma had come to an end for reasons that perhaps I'll explain in a different post. So, we sold our house, packed up our bags, and headed East.

The first 4-5 months went by pretty smoothly. Once it hit 5 1/2 months, however, the move began to wear on me. Finding a church who's doctrine was Biblically sound; the job-hunt for my dad; various illnesses that set our family behind; the need to step out of my little bubble and meet new people - it all began to bog me down. I started to question God's sovereignty. As much as I regret to admit it, I really did hate living here (and in some ways, though to a lesser degree, I still do). If a few months before someone were to tell me my life would be a mess, I would have scoffed. Now it was a reality.

Just last night I was having a chat with myself. I talk to myself. A lot. Laying on my bed, I began to mutter how slow, yet fast, the time has gone since moving. While going through all the things that have happened since moving, I began to see this move in a new light.

Moving here has been the hardest thing in my life. It's been difficult. It's been challenging. It still is difficult and challenging. I most definitely am not at a point where I can say that I am ready to accept Pennsylvania as my home. But over the past year and half, I have been learning that, while I do have negative feelings towards my outward surroundings, I cannot allow them to dictate how I will fulfill God's purpose for me while I'm here. God has planted me here for this season of my life. I don't know how long I'll be here; maybe until I graduate from high school, maybe until I get married, maybe it will be for the rest of my life. But while I am here, I intend, by God's grace, to use my time to fullest. To reach out to those He has placed in my life. To influence those around my for Christ. To take full advantage of the opportunities He has given me. To know that I have lived here and lived here well.

Everyone goes through trials. Some are temporary, others long-lasting. Some can even be akin to what the apostle Paul would describe as a thorn in the flesh (see 2 Corinthians 12:7). Yet, we can choose how we will resource these trials. We can determine whether we will fight against them or allow them to grow us.

"My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials,

knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience.

But let patience have its perfect work,

that you may be perfect and complete,

lacking nothing."

~ James 1:3-4 ~

I still buck against the reality of living here. These three years have been the longest three years of my life. I have begged the Lord to take this burden away from me. And, if not allowing me to live elsewhere, at least to let me get used to living here. I've become angry at Him when it seems He has not answered my prayer.

But He has. Through the pain has come a healing that, without it, I can't imagine where I would be. By entrusting me with this trial, He has entrusted to me the boundless limits of His mercy and grace. I can honestly say that I would go through the whole ordeal again to know the Lord would grow me as much as He has. Should He choose to bless me with this burden my whole life, so be it. I have tested the grace of God and found it not to be lacking. I have tested His mercy and kindness and found it to be in constant supply. I have tested His faithfulness and it is very great. I have eaten the fruit of His goodness each and every day and have found it to be very sweet.

His Ways Are Past Finding Out

A couple days ago, Carissa and I were having what we call a God-is-awesome-chat. The content of such chats is pretty self-explanatory. Basically, we talk about how awesome God is - His character, His love, His redemption and grace, Him. During this particular conversation, Carissa stated how amazing it is that God would choose to love through us - a holy, infallible, and perfect Creator loving through sinful, fallible, rebellious human beings. It truly is a mind-boggling concept. Later, I started mulling another related concept over in my mind: why would God entrust any form of Himself to me?

He promises me His faithfulness . . . even when my heart is turned away to idols. Even when I shake my fist at Him and question His sovereignty.

He gives me both physical and spiritual blessings everyday . . . and yet how often I forget to thank Him.

He has plucked my life from eternal damnation in hell . . . yet, oh, how my heart always lingers on the edge of that fiery pit.

He has set my feet upon the Rock that shall never be moved . . . and I still allow myself to wallow in the sinking sand of false doctrine and diluted post-modern theology.

He has given me His grace . . . but daily I take advantage of it by returning to my sin. How often I make it's power ineffective in my life. How little I have tested its limits by being content with a mediocre level in my work, not pushing myself beyond my capabilities and striving towards a higher standard He has called me to.

His mercy is new every morning . . . oh, how often I tempt Him every hour to turn His hand of wrath against me.

He calls me to be His ambassador . . . worldliness is in my heart and my ability to remain a pure witness for Him has been marred.

He forgave me when I was a helpless sinner, openly defying His name; He didn't expect me to receive it or even take it kindly; He gave it to me freely . . . how seldom I forgive others in that manner.

He gave up His life out of sheer love for me . . . am I willing to die for my love of Christ?

Oh, my soul - live for God!

"Platonic" Relationships

A few weeks ago, I was talking to a friend of mine about the concept of maintaining a platonic relationship with a guy. You know, those friendships where you see the guy and girl meeting for coffee once a week, "spilling the beans" on matters of their heart, and yet they claim they have no romantic interest in one another. And this raised a question in my mind: is it possible to have a strong, one-on-one relationship with a young man and still have no emotional or physical attraction to him?

The term platonic relationship comes from Plato, the Greek philosopher. Plato believed that we humans are preexisting souls encapsulated in physical bodies upon birth. So our bodies are not a part of our essence in the way that our souls are. In other words, the soul of John can be best friends with the soul of Lindsay, but their bodies can be completely absent from the friendship. So John and Lindsay will be "just friends." Neither will develop a romantic or sexual interest in the other.

Does that happen in real life? From our own experiences and from the romantic dramas and comedies that play on this theme, we know things typically go the other way. Why? Because our souls are not compartmentalized from our bodies; we are emotional-physical-spiritual beings. Emotional intimacy is a prelude to physical intimacy, and in marriage these go hand in hand, each promoting the other.

So can a girl be friends with a guy? Sure. Just don't pretend you're compartmentalized. If you aren't interested in pursuing the possibility of marriage with him, keep the emotional intimacy at bay. Emotional intimacy between a man and woman is something that, I believe, is to be reserved for a firm relationship and engagement that is intentionally headed towards marriage and, ultimately, marriage itself. Until a man has shared with the woman his desire to marry her in the near future, the woman should feel no obligation and, honestly, has no business sharing her most intimate feelings with him. Likewise, the man should not feed off of a woman's emotional vulnerability in order to feed his "knight in shining armor" drive. Hearts are no small thing to be tampered with.

A good way to avoid getting too emotionally attached with a guy is, in my view, to cut down or completely cut out one-on-one time with him. While you may not see it as a "date," he might, even if he tells you otherwise. Either he needs to "man up", declare his intentions and set a marriage-oriented direction for the relationship, or he needs to free your time and ultimately your heart for another man.

7 Ways to Charm Your Man

Yesterday my mom and I were over at my grandparents' house, mainly just to check in and see how they're doing since they both are up in years. I love going to their house. It's so full of history. My favorite thing to do is to go through their old belongings (the ones they let people go through, that is . . .); a ration packet from the Great Depression; my grandfather's army badges from World War 2; and then there's the old clothes of the timeless vintage style. Anyways, this particular time, I was browsing through my grandmother's old magazines she had kept throughout the years. I came across an issue of Coronet Magazine, circa 1950. I found this little article entitled "7 Ways to Charm Your Man" and thought it was way too cute to pass up.

1. Your voice must be gentle and warm, then he’ll want to listen to your expressive tones. And you’ll know the value of a soft whisper, but – most important – you’ll know when not to talk.

2. Your laugh . . . that special little chuckle which is all your own . . . the toss of your head as you laugh at his jokes . . . across a crowded room, your secret smile which takes him into your heart.

3. Your hair . . . blowing freely in the wind, tempting him to run his fingers through . . . even the little bit that stands straight up and defies attempts to tidy it – it’s endearing and he’ll love it.

4. Your nose . . . because it’s shiny, although you bemoan the fact and try hard to make the powder stay on . . . the amusing, lovable way you wrinkle it up when something pleases you.

5. Your attention . . . because you are a good listener and take an interest in what he has to say, which makes him feel important; also the encouragement you give him when he feels unsure.

6. Your dress . . . it’s just right for all occasions and you never embarrass him by wearing outrageous styles, colors and trimmings that are fussy and conspicuous . . . and besides, you walk firmly, with upright, graceful carriage, in ridiculously feminine, high-heeled shoes.

7. Your eyes . . . because they are so expressive, sparkling with fun or flashing with anger . . . because they send him charming messages which only he can read, and because they are the windows into which he can look and always be sure of finding the real You.

A Call to Anguish - David Wilkerson

Once again, the ministry of Eric and Leslie Ludy has struck to the heart of what true Christianity is all about. This past weekend, they paid tribute to the recently-killed David Wilkerson, founder of Teen Challenge, hero of the faith, and champion for Christ. The following is a short film featuring part of a sermon Mr. Wilkerson preached entitle "A Call to Anguish." And, again, my eyes were not dry by the end of it.



To read David Wilkerson's last blog entry, go here.

Blow Me Away

This morning I was doing my usual routine of blog surfing and I stumbled upon a highly compelling video on Eric and Leslie Ludy's ministry site. Throughout the whole video, I cried tears of sorrow, repentence, joy, and ultimately, gratitude for all the Savior has done for me.



"Is not the Lamb that was slain worthy to receive the reward of His suffering?

To Be Lost in the Love of My Lord

To be honest, I've always been quite indifferent towards Valentine's Day. I still am. I loath the color red. Seeing little teddy bears holding out heart-shaped pillows with "Be Mine" embroidered across the front is anything but cute. I like the idea of being my own little self everyday, not just on "Single Awareness Day." And, I admit, it's not too hard for me to enjoy being single since I'm not that much of a hopeless romantic anyways.

Yet I realize that all girls aren't like me. Some girls find themselves depressed on the day's leading up to and after Valentine's Day. They feel that twinge of loneliness and wonder when Mr. Darcy will turn up. And, yes, even steel-hardy me feels the "man-ache" every now and then. But it's during the times of impatience and discontent that I find myself evaluating my desires. Why do I feel the need for human love? Why is my heart discontent with all the love my Father has lavished on me already?

Now, please don't misread me. This is not to say one shouldn't desire the love from a fellow human. God created us with an inherent desire to be found loved in the eyes of others. Humans need humans. But when our desire for love outweighs our desperate need to be fulfilled in Christ alone, we are setting ourselves up for a severe disappointment. For every longing our heart craves for, Christ has already made the grade for it.

I want to be loved - ". . . I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore with lovingkindness I have drawn you." - Jeremiah 31:3

I want someone to hold my hand - ". . . I will uphold you with My righteous right hand." - Isaiah 41:10

I want to be accepted and valued - ". . . He made us accepted in the Beloved." - Ephesians 1:6

I want someone who will champion my causes, one who is willing to fight for me - "The Lord will fight for you . . . " - Exodus 14:14

I want someone to help me - "There is no one like the God of Jeshurun, who rides the heavens to help you . . ." - Deuteronomy 33:26

I don't want to have to bear the load of life on my own - "Even to your old age, I am He, and even to gray hairs I will carry you! I have made, and I will bear; Even I will carry and will deliver you." - Isaiah 46:4

There are many, many more desires my heart longs for in regards to love. But what use is it to worry about my future? Who am I to desire anything else than what God has willed for my life right now? It is utter foolishness to believe that any human could instantaneously fulfill my heart. Every-day interactions with people prove this fact.

If I do not look to Christ to fulfill my heart, there is no way I could possibly bring even a small amount of fulfillment to a man. An unfullfilled human brings less than fulfillment to another human. Oh, how my heart longs for its desires to be reconciled with the love of Christ! May my heart always find refuge in Christ, my God. May I look to His Word as a comfort in times of loneliness, His grace in times of weakness, and His enduring faithfulness and love to calm my restless soul.

Why I Love Being Feminine

Photo Courtesy of A Lady's Findings

It's wonderful being a girl. So many times it's the little, seemingly-insignificant things that delight the feminine class. Perhaps this post may seem a bit rambled, but here are some of my favorite and enjoyable side effects to being feminine.

- The graceful movement of tucking a stray piece of hair behind my ear while I type on my laptop in a cafe'.

- The mystery of having a smile teasing my lips as I shop for romaine lettuce and bell peppers.

- The dignified feeling that comes when I stand with my shoulders back and head slightly tilted upwards.

- Enjoying a spontaneous skip or hop every once in a while - no matter who sees.

- The soft scent of powder makeup.

- Wearing ribbon in my hair that was salvaged from the wrapping of the gift from my valentine.

- The swish of my skirt as I sit down in the car.

- The prim sound of heels clipping against the pavement.

- Knowing that a flower can immediately transform any hair catastrophe.

- The light reflected from sparkly jewelry.

- Walking through the fabric store and picking out my wedding colors.

- The ability to "brain laugh" when a boy gawks at my brightly colored rain boots.

- Ruffled necklines.

- The domestic feeling that surges through me when I put on an apron.

- Adding curlicues and swirlygigs to my writing.

- Silently reveling in the "please-clarify" look of the young man who takes my complicated order at Starbucks.

- The distinguished air that only women can hold.

I know there are more perks to being feminine out there - what are yours?